Fifty Shades of Silence

Psssst. Did you just hear that?

THAT. That-right-there.

Listen, reeeeaaal closely.

*cue long exaggerated, Seacrest-type pause

Yep, you heard it.

… the sound of {sweet} silence …

Isn’t it wonderful?

And, how on earth, do you ask, does a mom acquire a silent household in the middle of the doggone summer?

Well, up here in these neck of the woods, we have a thaaang we like to call year-round schools.


Yes siree. While many moms in America are robotically slapping together their 145th PB&J and distributing empty threats to quarreling siblings, there are a select few of us who are plopped on the sofa, eating bon-bons alongside Elisabeth Hasselbeck and The View (you can sense the bon-bon sarcasm, right?)

Yes, it’s truly a bitter-sweet system, my friends. Although, I do treasure those carefree weeks with my babies — enjoying sun, sand and afternoons filled with laughter — the words ‘Are we there yet?’, ‘I’m bored’ and ‘She pinched me’, can eliminate the joy faster than you can say “that Tanning Mom is a nut job.”

So today, I’d like to raise a coffee cup to my year round possé who is, once again, adjusting to a quiet household.

A toast … to uninterrupted phone conversations; to showering without the risk of mentally scarring wandering neighborhood kids; to eating lunch — free of spilled milk, bodily noises and dinosaur chicken nuggets. May your days be filled with the peace and guilty pleasure that can only come from a Starbucks vanilla latte and unlimited downtime with Christian Grey.


4 Responses to “Fifty Shades of Silence”

  1. Melissa Says:
    July 11th, 2012 at 6:09 am

    Curse you – mine are home until August! ;) Enjoy the peace and quiet for me!

  2. Kim Says:
    July 11th, 2012 at 9:39 am

    Lol… I work, outside the home, 9 hours a day/5 days a week… and I’m still jealous. I think the kids actually save up 9 hours of butt-headedery for the exact moment I walk through that door. hahahha

  3. April Says:
    July 11th, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    I’ve always been so curious about year-round school and now that we’re in it I think it’s better than sliced bread!!! Cheers (with my venti skinny latte)!

  4. Sue Says:
    July 17th, 2012 at 6:58 pm


    Shut up.

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